Moments of Clarity are rare and precious and they are when we do our best work.
We make an average of 35,00 decisions every day; most are instinctive such as which hand to open the door with and how to pull on our socks, and many are semi-conscious like which door to walk through and what socks to wear.
It’s those big decisions that we have to get right that cause us the most grief.
Career change, relationship reflection, home purchase, relocation, children’s schooling, social activities, sport preparation, and medical treatment are examples of the kind of decisions we are forced to make that demand serious consideration, debate and analysis.
The more impactful the potential choice, the more thought we attribute to the decision-making process. The tougher it is the harder we think. The harder we think the cloudier it gets.
Without the gift of impeccable Vulcan logic, we are forced to write pros and cons lists, talk to friends, google endlessly and concede that sleep is overrated. Eventually, exhausted, we may take the safe option and surrender to the status quo (indecision) or toss a coin (rash decision) or allow someone else to decide for us (opt out).
One thing for sure is that any of these options will sooner or later bite us in the proverbial and inject a venom of regret and resentment.
Pros and cons lists are subjective, which means a subconscious leaning to one argument or including someone else’s opinions causes a skewed result. Googling and coin tossing are unreliable and sufficient REM sleep is essential to physical and mental wellbeing.
The best decisions are made with a clear mind – after the weighing up, analysis and debate.
We must mute all the voices except our own, put our lists away, turn off the computer, drop our coins into the piggybank and allow ourselves to feel alone and vulnerable. Soak it in – this is our decision; we are going to make it now and we will love ourselves and be loved for it.
At this moment we have only one tool at our disposal – honesty. What do WE really WANT?
We might want a sea change, or a fresh work environment; we have to desire this. A desire to quit work and care for a loved one may be our primary driving factor over a sense of duty. We may love our job so much we don’t want to retire; ignore peer pressure and bob till we drop.
The end goal is happiness. If we’re not happy then those close to us can’t be.
It might sound odd coming from a coach but this is one time when we push our beliefs aside. Our unconscious mind is riddled with limiting beliefs and distorted perceptions of our expectations and responsibilities. Once we have made our decision it is then time to revisit our beliefs and modify them, if necessary to ensure a successful outcome.