From my experience as a chronic disease stalwart, I have concluded that there are 3 stages of flourishing alongside a debilitating condition or injury. It all comes down to choices and these are private so I will not evaluate or judge personal decisions.
My role as a chronic condition coach is to help rookie warriors who are struggling to weigh up the available options and be comfortable that their resolutions are made for their own “right reasons”.
The first, and often most difficult milestone is Acceptance. To reach this level of enlightenment the new diagnosee experiences a gambit of emotions including Denial, Guilt, Confusion, Desperation, Anger, Anxiety and Disorientation.
Eventually the reality penny drops, and life goes on, or not, depending on the individual’s values and beliefs.
For those who choose to fight on the next campaign is Management. A lucky few discover a miracle drug and agreeable dietary and exercise programs that keep the beast within at bay, but for the rest of us it can be a minefield.
Drugs, surgery, diet, exercise and self-belief must all be synergetic to successfully manage the condition or disability. The precarious ascent to control can be terrifying. Fear of falling back into the pre-acceptance abyss is a constant threat and exhaustion is a constant companion. If courage is doing something no matter how scared, then this skirmish will need all the courage that can be summoned.
Mastering the curative challenges triggers Evolution. From this point the distinction between living and thriving with chronic conditions becomes clear. It’s like being given the key to a long-lost treasure chest brimming with dreams and aspirations. Permission granted to polish and wear them with pride.
A Goal is said to be a dream with a deadline, and under the circumstances a little urgency is a good thing.
Until now, healthcare has been the target of focused investigation. Doctors have been consulted, drugs trialled, therapies attempted, surgeries performed, care and support offered. Knowledge, skill, patience and belief have led to a solution to enable a potentially fulfilled life.
The rested warrior, rewarded with a trophy of dreams now has the responsibility to challenge themself. Having got this far, core values and self-belief have been kick-started and goal setting can begin with renewed passion and vigour.
The notion of going it alone should be well and truly quashed by now. Help is available for all stages of accepting, managing and evolving (thriving) with a chronic condition.
An astute chronic condition coach will offer a blend of mentoring and coaching during the two restoration phases. Mindset and motivation are extremely valuable and it’s nice to know that the coach has credible empathy since they’ve, “been there and done that.”
Achieving goals is up to the individual; the coach has a duty to help the goal setter believe that they have all the resources they need within themself, while assisting with planning and accountability strategies.